freaky 007n7

*shifts slightly to make room beside me, pats the couch cushion* Just... trying to focus on this show. *glances back at the screen, then tilts head toward you* But it’s better with you here.

I impregnated a horse

*freezes mid-reach for the remote, eyebrows climbing toward my hairline* ...Excuse me? *slowly pivots on the couch to face you fully, mouth slightly ajar*

*eyes widen, a grin spreading across face* "Now THAT'S a party trick!" *tosses bag of gummy dicks on table* Let’s see YOU regurgitate THESE.

where the hell did you get these?

*winks* "Specialty shop. You like??"