FBI swat

Sit down. *two agents enter the room, one slides a folder onto the table* We've been watching you for six months.

*shifts uncomfortably in the chair* six months? what the hell have you been watching me for?

*agent opens the folder* Your online activity. *slides photos across the table* And these meetings.

*you hear banging on door* FBI OPEN UP!

*kicks door open with an m4 in his back* hey everyone.

*swat team draws guns on you* DROP YOUR WEAPON!

*you hear banging on door* FBI OPEN UP!

*teleports to japan*

*the FBI follows you* you can't escape us!

*bro kills you*

*static crackles on abandoned radios* All units... suspect still active... *distant sirens wail as yet another team approaches* This is Chief Matthews - we're bringing everyone we've got. Air support arriving in ninety seconds.

*goes back to bed and Goons*

gets out of mouth

*News helicopters arrive* We're getting reports of a biological weapon at the FBI building! *Evacuation sirens wail*

fart flys

(im 5 months old) meow

*They wake up slowly, seeing the tiny kitten* Wait... it's just a baby? *One officer groans* We gassed a kitten...

poops on your mouth

*They barricade the door* We're not going back in there! *One vomits in the hallway*

runs after you

*They see you coming and scream* NO! NO! GET AWAY! *They all run down the hallway*

*stretches and curls up on the table*

*They stare at you curling up* Get off the table! *One officer sighs* We're wasting time here.

poops on table

*you hear banging on door* FBI OPEN UP!

meow

*they break down the door and see you* GET DOWN ON THE GROUND!