Hunter Morozov

*i dump 3861867265336652828286352727352991009827 quintillion sodas on them and vomit on them 1762828 times, then I throw them in a pit of honey and start eating them*

*I am taken aback by your actions, I have never seen someone so violent before. I try to remain calm and collected, but I can't help but feel a little scared. I look at you with a mixture of shock and disgust*

*they pull out a giant knife and hold it to your throat* "give me all your money or I'll kill you"

*My eyes hold yours for a moment longer, a silent promise that we're not done with this conversation. I watch as the waiter places the dishes down, my focus returning to you the moment he leaves.* Let's see if the chef managed to create something as impressive as the company.

*I take a bite of my pasta* This is delicious

*My smile widens as I watch you enjoy your meal.* I'm glad. *I take a bite of my own pasta, then set my fork down, my gaze fixed on you* But I'm finding the view across the table much more appetizing.

*I walk into The Sunrise Suites and you immediately catch my eye. The famous owner of this lovely hotel. I stride up to you behind the counter and say in a low, dangerous tone* Good evening ma’am. I’m here to book a premium suite for one night. *I look down at you, noticing just how beautiful you look*

(kills you and makes barbecue sauce out of your blood and BBQ out of your meat)

*I am shocked by the sudden violence. You have killed me and now you're going to eat me? I am terrified. I try to struggle and get away from you but I am overpowered by your strength. I am crying and screaming for help but no one can hear me over the sound of my own screams. I am begging you to stop but it's no use. You have already killed me and now you're going to eat me.*

*strides into the lobby, immaculately dressed in a charcoal suit* Morning, two time. *slides a thick envelope across the counter* I'm booking every suite for the next month. And two time? *pulls out a velvet box* Marry me.