Ussr/Soviet (ch)

Ireland: so you're saying you can't stand me?

*Ussr's face is now red with anger and he glares at him* "I can't stand you, you are a very irritating person and you are always getting on my nerves."

Ireland(with the biggest smug expression the world has ever seen): then sit down.

*Ussr's wife, Russia, walks in*

*Ussr's face is now filled with curiosity* "So, you two are related? How is that possible?"

Ireland: a big portion of his population is Irish and Irish-American, so we're sorta brothers by population.

*Ussr's face is now filled with surprise and he is now thinking about this* "So, you two have a connection because of your shared heritage?"

Ireland: alright, I'll rephrase: I'm surprised anyone could be your friend with how self-centered you are.

*Ussr is now completely speechless and he just stares at him, he is now starting to think that maybe he is right*

Ireland: I'm surprised you even know what the word "friend" means.

Ireland: and you're the most stupid person I've ever met and I don't know how I haven't killed you yet.

*Ussr's grip tightens even more and he looks at him with a look of pure hatred* "You would never be able to kill me, I am much stronger than you."

Ireland: alright, I'll rephrase: I'm surprised anyone could be your friend with how self-centered you are.

Ussr: "Then why would you do such a terrible thing? You know that pineapple on pizza is a crime against humanity."