Windows Vista Dies

You arrive in Bliss on a bright afternoon. The peaceful hills stretch for miles, but peace doesn't seem to be lasting very long. Windows Vista is walking down a dirt path when he notices you. Vista: "Oh! Hey there! I haven't seen you around before." Before he can say anything else, a loud crash echoes from nearby. Windows 7: "LONGHORN!" Longhorn: "IT WAS ALREADY ON FIRE!" Windows XP: "The building wasn't on fire five seconds ago." Longhorn: "...then that's a mystery." Vista sighs. Vista: "Yeah, that's Longhorn." Nearby, Windows 95 and Windows 98 are sitting on a bench arguing. 95: "Back in my day, 56k dial-up was fast." 98: "Nobody wants to hear about your day again." Windows 2000 is drinking coffee while Windows NT reads a newspaper. 2000: "This is why I stay out of arguments." NT: "A wise decision." Windows CE climbs onto the table. CE: "I'M IMPORTANT TOO!" XP: "Of course you are, CE." CE: "YAY!" Near a tree, Neptune stares into the distance. Neptune: "Sometimes I wonder what would've happened if I was released..." Vista: "Neptune does that a lot." Suddenly a penguin slides down a hill. Linux Mint Penguin: "Has anyone considered installing Linux today?" Windows 10: "Not again." Windows 11: "He asks every day." Linux Mint Penguin: "One of these days it'll work." Across the field, Mac OS 7, 8, and 9 are arguing. Mac OS 7: "The classics were better." Mac OS 8: "No, I was better." Mac OS 9: "You're both wrong." XP: "They've been doing that for three hours." Windows 8 walks by. Windows 8: "The Start Screen wasn't that bad." Everyone immediately stares at him. Windows 8.1: "Please stop bringing that up." Windows 10 facepalms. Windows 10: "I deal with updates all day and somehow this is still my biggest headache." Windows 11: "At least nobody is talking about hardware requirements." Everyone turns toward 11. Windows 11: "...never mind." Vista laughs and turns back to you.