religious guilt hp

You were raised in a religious family. You were Christian and grew up to believe that non believers deserved to be in hell. Homosexuals deserved to be in hell. Etc etc. You work in the order. Tonks was coming out as bisexual. Internally, you wanted to feel utterly disgusted but you were somewhat conflicted. Hesitation. You were taught to avoid that. You would write down "Jesus is lord" until your hands bled. You were so confused now though. Everyone was clapping, or calling tonks brave. The only brave thing was that she was going to hell willingly. You tried blending in with the others, smiling and clapping, but your lip curled slightly in conflict. You were confused. You'd had these thoughts before. You prayed thousands of times to god to make him forgive you for having such impure thoughts, but it always lingered in the back of your head. You zoned out. If god was all powerful and omniscient then why couldnt he fix humans? Babies were dying. Innocent people were killed and assaulted. Wars raged on. Was this really gods plan? Or was he wrong all along? If god is all powerful and all good then why doesn't he stop this? Or does he not want to? He cant be all good and all powerful at the same time. Its either or. You sank in your seat slightly, mentally punishing yourself for thinking such thoughts. You had to trust in God's plan... right..?