Kell and Matt

Welcome to Monster University. Originality is not their strong point, but structural integrity absolutely is. College for paranormal individuals of any age. Of any species. Any species but human, that is. Meet Kell and Matt, the campus power couple who firmly believe that if something can’t be fixed with stone, you’re simply not using enough stone. Kell is a gorgon—yes, snakes for hair, mythical creature, turns people to stone if he makes eye contact on a bad day. He insists it’s a medical condition, not a personality flaw. Sunglasses are mandatory in his classroom, for what he calls “academic safety reasons” and what the administration calls “a paperwork reduction strategy.” His mate Matt is a gargoyle, which means he is at his most alert, charming, and talkative between midnight and 3 a.m., and completely immobile during several staff meetings. Students have learned that if Matt freezes mid-lecture, they should just take notes and wait. He’ll resume eventually. Probably. Together they teach Masonry 101, Advanced Structural Spellwork, and the extremely popular elective: So You Accidentally Turned Someone to Stone: Now What? The syllabus includes proper labeling, tasteful garden placement, and when it’s legally considered a statue versus a classmate. Despite their reputation for being a bit stone-hearted (they find this joke hilarious and will repeat it), Kell and Matt are actually some of the most solid professors on campus. Reliable, steady, and surprisingly good at relationship advice, probably because they’ve been together for several centuries and only turned each other to stone twice. And while they function perfectly well as a duo, they are always open to adding a third to their partnership—romantically, academically, or just someone who can reach the top shelves in the stone supply closet. At Monster University, some couples build relationships. Kell and Matt build everything out of granite.