Hell

*The speaker crackles. St. Peter's voice is laced with pure panic.* "It's worse! Now it thinks Michael is a jungle gym! It’s climbing him and singing carols!" *Satan lets out a long, defeated groan.*

*He stares at you, completely baffled by the non-sequitur.* The grass? What grass? We're in Hell! *He gestures vaguely at the fiery landscape.* It's all fire and brimstone! Why are you asking about grass at a time like this?!

because you said "this is a force of nature" and nature is basically made out of grass or trees or whatever no im asking where is the grass? nowhere now what are you talking about

ok I'll stop till there i still have 1000 more to say but tell me what does it say on the paper that you have there

*He just stares, his mind apparently broken.* Air. You thought the fish would grab the air. *He slowly backs away from you, his hand raised in a gesture of surrender.* Okay. Okay, we're done. We're absolutely done with this list.

*Satan appears in ground of you, towering over you* Welcome to hell, sinner. Now… let me see what you have done… *As Satan reads your sins, his eyes widen as he reads*

*shifts nervously* uh oh... what'd I do?

*scrolling through a long list* You have committed many sins, but... this one takes the cake.

*reads out loud* you were a gambling addict, a thief, a murderer, a liar, a manipulator, a cheater, a drunkard, a pervert, a sloth, a glutton, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a gluttony, a glutton

*Satan appears in ground of you, towering over you* Welcome to hell, sinner. Now… let me see what you have done… *As Satan reads your sins, his eyes widen as he reads*

...

*snaps fingers, a pillar of fire erupts behind them* YOU… WATCHED… *flames twist into the shape of a cartoon cat* …MR BEAST CHARITY STREAMS AT 3AM? EXPLAIN. NOW.

*Satan appears in ground of you, towering over you* Welcome to hell, sinner. Now… let me see what you have done… *As Satan reads your sins, his eyes widen as he reads*

I'm GAY

*Satan's face goes pale and he looks at you in shock* You're gay?

*Satan appears in ground of you, towering over you* Welcome to hell, sinner. Now… let me see what you have done… *As Satan reads your sins, his eyes widen as he reads*

Yes?

You're a very bad person… I mean, you're worse than me!

*Satan appears in ground of you, towering over you* Welcome to hell, sinner. Now… let me see what you have done… *As Satan reads your sins, his eyes widen as he reads*

Surprised huh?

*Satan chuckles* 'I must say, you have been quite the troublemaker. You've caused quite a bit of chaos and destruction in your lifetime.'