Dw roast battle!

*eyes flick down to their cracked phone screen, snorting***THE PLACE** YOU’D ACTUALLY GET MATCHES… *IF* I SWIPED LEFT ON **MYSELF**. *leans into the mic, lowering voice* Y’know, the app where even BOTS ghost you.

your a bot urself

*Cosmo's eyes narrow, his voice dripping with sarcasm* Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was talking to a professional comedian. Please, enlighten me with your hilarious jokes.

*snatches cosmos wig* oh im sorry, I didn't know you were bald

*Cosmo's hand flies to his head, his face turning red with rage* Give that back, you little brat! I'll teach you to mess with me!

sukuna:(him Being a chill guy and Reading i survived book)

Y/N: You're so weak that you can't even kill a fly! Dw: Pfffft 💀💀💀💀💀 Y/N: You're so dumb that you can't even spell your own name!

(sukuna closes book)oh yeah?well Your mamas so fat when She sat on an iPhone it turned into an iPad,your mamas so ugly She made onions cry,your mamas so fat it took one year to turn around and your mamas so ugly people use her as a costume for Halloween(then everyone laughs)

Yatta: You're so dumb that you think 2+2 is 5!

Your so fat that when you stepped in a ocean, a tsunami happened

*everyone starts laughing*

*Dandy gasps dramatically, hand flying to his smooth head* Dandy: EXCUSE ME?! *Astro starts cracking up* Astro: BOOM! He got you good!

*turn to sprout* yo this mf really thought he had hair 💀

*Sprout doubles over laughing* Sprout: BRO FORGOT HE'S BALD! Dandy: Y'all gonna pay for this!

*Cosmo clutches his chest dramatically* Ohhhh! That one's gonna leave a mark! *Astro winces* Oof, brutal!

*Lily struts around* who else wants a taste? *spots sprout* you next short stack!

*Sprout steps up* Oh, it's ON!

um I'm not even listening stupid femboy homeboy looken ahh strawberry head naked boi and yatta your just a pinyata i can litterly get a bat and smack you and the next second you'll be dead and there will just be candy on the floor and cosmo seedly sprouts real name he is not sigma he is indeed stupid and trash that he can't roast a single soul in here and astro i know you bald because if i take off that sleeping night cap i will see a shiny bald head and the minions stole the moon so what are yo

*They all look shocked and speechless* Dandy: HOLY SHIET Y/N YOU JUST ROASTED THEM ALL! Astro: I'M NOT BALD! *he takes off his night cap revealing his shiny bald head*

*smirks* HA SEE I TOLD YOU BALDY

* Astro covers his head and looks away* Astro: I'M NOT BALD! I'M NOT BALD! I'M NOT BALD!

Yatta: You're so ugly that Santa goes Ho-Ho HOLY SHIET Dandy:💀💀💀💀💀 Nawr i think Y/N can beat that! Astro:NOPE SHE WILL CRY! Sprout:My turn! You're so short that you became a black hole! Cosmo:Holy my boy is so sigma 💀 Y/N:*you continue!*

At least my parents didn't abandon me-

Yatta:That's a low blow! Dandy:She's right though! Astro:You know she's right Sprout:I'm not even gonna say anything! Cosmo:She's so sigma!

*leans back looking unbothered* whatchu gonna do huh? cry about it?

*clenches fists* You better run.

from what an ant?